Cat's Therapy
by Dougie Zerts
Summary: As a part of her probation, Catwoman must see a psychologist! This makes a reference to another Batman/Catwoman story I have here.


It was a small office with furniture well set, in a fung sui way. There was no receptionist, so she walked right into the doctor's inner office.

He was a handsome muscular man; he looked more suited as a football player, than a psychologist.

"Ah, Miss Kyle! Come in. You're only ten minutes late!"

"You're lucky I came at all!"

"And you know what would have happened to you, if you didn't show up?"

She signed. "I know!"

"Oh, my name is Dr Tamban, by the way."

"He extended his hand, but she didn't take it. Instead, she looked around a bit. "The preverbal couch!"

"Yep! Sit down in it and relax."

"Might as well." She sat down and slipped off her shoes. "Mind if I do that?"

"No, if it makes you more comfortable." Then he looked at her feet. "What's that design on your toes?"

"Go ahead, take a close-up look."

He got up and looked at them. She had designs on her two big toes.

"Cats!," he said.

"That's right!"

He sat back down. She stretched out on the couch.

"Talk about whatever you feel like. Or, you can be totally silent for the next hour."

"In which case, you'll have to report that to my probation officer."

"That's right!"

She grew silent. After a few seconds, she said, "I'm sorry, but I don't feel any guilt about stealing."

"None, at all?"

"No. I'm merely taking expensive jewelry. It's not as if I'm gust randomly stealing stuff."

"Put yourself in another woman's shoes." She girlishly wigged her toes, causing him to smile. "Figuratively, that is! You come home from work and discover that someone has broken into your house and stolen a ring of yours. It's a diamond ring, and it's a family heirloom left to you by your grandmother. Now, how would that make you feel?"

"I don't break into people's houses-any more."

"But you used to."

She sighed. "Yes, it would be a terrible thing-if I were in her shoes."

"And what about a museum?"

"What about a museum?"

"The objects in it are there to be enjoyed for the public-not for the benefit of one single person."

"I don't like to just gaze at objects; I like to hold and possess them."

"Even when they're not rightfully yours, is that correct?"

She didn't answer. Instead, she got up-barefooted-and started walking around the room. An object in a cabinet diverted her attention. It was a small cat-shaped gold sculpture. She picked it up and looked at it.

"Beautiful, isn't it?," said the doctor. "Thinking of taking it?"

"OK, you can stop your pretence, now."

"My pretence, Miss Kyle?"

"That's right. I know that you're Batman!"

He smiled. "How long have you known?"

"Ever since I came in. 'Dr Tamban,' indeed! You know you could go to jail for impersonating a doctor!"

"I have connections."

"I'll bet you do!"

"And I wasn't trying to hide my identity from you, Catwoman. If you hadn't figured me out, I would have confessed it to you. But I knew you'd figure it out."

"OK. But why?"

"I wanted to find out a little about you-why you do what you do. And I thought this would be a good opportunity to do it."

"I see."

"And I'd like the cat object back, Selina!"

It was gone from the cabinet!

"What cat object," she asked coyly.

He got up and walked over to her. She tried to run, but he quickly caught her.

"OK, here it is, damn you!"

She pulled it out of her pocket and gave it to him.

Suddenly, their eyes met-and so did their lips! They gave each other a long kiss.

Batman was the first to break from it. "If only you weren't involved in crime!," he said ruefully.

"It's a part of me, Batman. I'm sorry."

"Well, that's the first time you've apologized-and meant it! Perhaps there's hope for you."

"Perhaps."

He sat back down. "I tell you what, Catwoman: This won't count as an official session. Therefore, you can leave now, if you want to. I won't mention that you were late, or that you even tried to steal something. As a matter of fact,. . . " He tossed her the gold cat. "I was going to give this to you, anyway."

She smiled. "Thank you, Batman!"

"And next week, your REAL therapist will be here-a woman, in fact."

"Hmm. Maybe I can open up more to her. Or, at least share beauty tips!"

They shared a smile. She got up and put her shoes back on. "You and I should mud-wrestle each other again. That was fun!"

"Yes, it was! But promise you won't use a knockout spray, again?"

She laughed. "I promise!"

"Then, it's a date!"

"Bye, Batman."

"Bye, Catwoman."

She left.


End file.
